“My husband and I have been married for 12 years now and before that I only had one long-term boyfriend. Sex was never a thing I really enjoyed before getting married.
Since the beginning of our marriage, our sex life was similar to what I was used to: having sex maybe once a month and masturbating when I needed to get off. Intercourse was something I wanted from time to time but my husband never insisted. Looking back my sexual drive was higher than his already then. Other parts of our relationship are great and we have a lovely marriage.
Couple of years ago my husband got a new job overseas and moved there. I decided to stay home. Before he moved, he brought up sex. He told me for the first time that he had noticed my needs and now would like me to have lovers just for sex. Needless to say I was in shock but we managed to talk it through. We set ground rules and he told me to go for it.
Now my husband still lives overseas and we meet three or four times a year. We call every day and our love is still strong. I’ve met a few guys on my own and let him know everything. At the moment I have two bulls who I meet maybe twice a month. My husband is fully aware of them and wants to know my dates with them. And I tell him everything – except the fact they are both well-endowed. Somehow that fact is hard for me to admit.
I’m a size queen. At least I think I am because my sex life has changed so much lately. For the first time I crave penetration and also have had orgasms while fucked. And I’m ashamed because of that. It’s killing me and I don’t know what to do. Should I tell my husband? What if he feels bad and feels he isn’t enough for me anymore? What if he isn’t?”
Firstly, please do not feel ashamed or guilty about how you feel and the situation that you’re in. You’re playing with other men with your husband’s permission and the last thing he would want is for you to have sex and NOT enjoy it. He understands that you have needs and as long as you are telling him about your encounters, he’s getting what he wants from the arrangement. I personally think you’re managing your marriage and Hotwifing in a very balanced manner.
As for enjoying bigger cocks, it’s only natural to feel and enjoy the difference. It sounds like you’re starting to discover what feels good for you and that’s the whole point of sexual exploration. I don’t know if you’re a true size queen quite yet, but if you’re concerned that you won’t be satisfied by your husband, or others that are average-sized, then start mixing things up. Explore other aspects of sexual pleasure and start viewing sex with big cocks as just one of many ways to get yourself off.
Maybe the next time you meet with your Bulls, ask them to please you only with their mouth and fingers for something different. Give them a task to satisfy you without any penetration. Try finding a Bull who has an average-sized penis so you can experiment with sexual positions and angles. I think you’ll be surprised how much you’ll still enjoy penetration with an average-sized penis if you find the right lover. There are definitely some things you just can’t do with super big dicks such as anal sex, at least not initially and certainly not all the time.
Until you have a better idea about whether you’re a true size queen or not, I don’t think you need to tell your husband, unless he actually asks how big your Bulls are. My guess is that he won’t really mind as long as you still want to be intimate with him, and as you would agree, that’s a different kind of pleasure that doesn’t need to be compared to your Hotwifing sex. I’m sure your husband doesn’t see the Bulls as competition so don’t focus on whether the sex is better or not. Husband and wife time is special so even if the sex isn’t intense or crazy with him, you can still make it amazing by incorporating what’s fun and exciting for you both.