Eats Well. Plays Well.

Thanks for the Bull Drought concerns everyone! The drought was happily temporary and I’m pleased to report that I finally met a decent guy. Actually, I had three coffee dates over a one-week period, though I’m only going to bother discussing two of them as it turned out one of the guys was attached. He seemed to think that the marriage was over but his wife just didn’t know about it… Anyway, I digress:

Guy 1: He was a tall, muscular, ripped guy with what looked to be a huge cock going by his profile on The Site. He maintained his physique with regular gym sessions and only eating one meal, once a day (intermittent fasting, or what have you). He didn’t order anything at all while I had a light lunch at a cafe.

Guy 2: He was a guy of average height and physique with a nice sized cock. He keeps busy running his own dessert business. He ordered a couple of ciders and enthusiastically encouraged me to try a few cocktails (he may have had ulterior motives…).

So which one did I end up fucking?

Food and SexIf you said BOTH, I wish that was true but Guy 1 left me cold. He looked good but he just wasn’t giving me anything to work with. He didn’t exude any sort of sexuality; even some gay vibes would have been interesting at least. Our conversation was engaging enough but there just was no point where I could imagine having sex with this guy. I didn’t even attempt to kiss him at the end of the date. I was happy to leave.

As for Guy 2, I could just tell right away that he was a fun guy who knew what he wanted. Within the first 15 minutes he was already plotting when we’d be having sex. He was complimentary, used my first name confidently and was comfortable talking about sex. He kinda already had me at pistachio mousse cake when he told me what he did for work. He certainly went through to the meat inspection round, and with my husband’s approval, he was my new Bull later that night.

Guy 1 actually went on to prove that I dodged a bullet as he got very abusive online. He was keen to play but I had to politely say that I didn’t feel it. His fragile ego came to the fore and he hurled a bunch of verbal abuse before blocking me. Very mature for a 30-something. The guy was clearly hangry. Give that man something decent to eat because one lousy tin of tuna once a day isn’t doing him much good!

And that brings me to my assessment that people who have a healthy appetite and appreciation for food are generally fun folk with a huge lust for life. They are also better in bed, dare I say. I mean, I want to be devoured in the same way a man feasts on a succulent steak or scrumptious sticky date pudding. The sort of guy who enjoys his senses being titillated by taste, smell and texture is the sort who will put his tongue anywhere. A man who only sees food as a necessity? I’ll pass.

This is an interesting theory that I might test out online with the guy who message me. If they can’t readily describe their perfect meal to me, perhaps their enjoyment of sex is fairly limited too? I’m certainly not alone is considering this food/sex relationship. There are a fair few articles that support my observations. If food and sex are basic needs, then people who just go through the motions with food probably feel the same way about sex. Those who like to ritualise eating (so taking one’s time, choosing the right combo of flavours, relishing each bite etc.) have the same approach to sex.

Needless to say, I’m certainly a foodie myself so that in itself presents a problem if I meet guys who are generally ‘meh’ about dining. I have to say I have a soft spot for guys whose eyes light up when a charcuterie board arrives along with drinks. It’s a primal instinct to react to food, even if you’re full. After all, who knows when you’ll get to eat next right? So when it comes to sex, I can’t deny that the sort of guy who fucks me like he wants to get his absolute fill of me will get an invitation to eat again any time.

What are your thoughts? Does your sex partner’s appetite for food correlate to awesome sex?


  1. Food art music all can affect your sex game all these things make up a part of you … And sex well im going to go out on a lim and say sex is a expiration of your self …. What is put into you makes a mix of what comes out of you … 😂…. Ok i couldn’t help that it of a side joke

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